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Recap:
Is it wrong to bang a cancer patient? Wouldn't it kind of cheer her up? Maybe a little?
These are undoubtedly some of the questions that are dancing through Derrick's head in the opening of Episode 6. And it's all understandable, of course, given that as far as we can tell Diem is blonde, beautiful and has a heart of pure gold. While it might be questionable whether the viewing public would want her sullied by Derrick, the notoriously sweaty alcoholic, for some reason the oddball romance is endearing.
Meanwhile, all eyes are on Evan's crotch as he reveals that he has suffered a hernia. He really shouldn't be doing anything but lying down and icing himself, much less doing all the climbing/running/bunging/oatmeal dumping required by the challenges. Will he stick it out til the end? Time will tell.
This week's challenge, Crossing Paths, is one of the most physically demanding we've seen yet. Basically, there are two platforms connected by a rope. Below, there is a (presumably very deep) river. The players need to crawl across the rope and swap platforms, but must cross paths halfway. This proves to be a pain in the ass.
Highlights from the competition include: Johnny proving himself as awesome by completing the entire length of rope using only his hands and upper body strength and Wes being an ass (shock!) by doing pull-ups before he reaches the end where he unleashes more verbal abuse on Casey. Half of the teams get DQed when someone falls, and Theo/Chanda beat Coral/Evan, meaning that the perennial winners get their first trip to deliberations where they are (in theory) vulnerable to exile.
Theo and Chanda make the obvious choice and send Wes/Casey into exile, thereby not pissing anyone off. At deliberations, although a few people throw some votes toward Tina/Kenny (who, curiously, don't seem to be as weak a team as Katie/Eric) it ends up being Tonya/Johnny being sent into exile. She is not pleased.
The episode ends with a barnburner of a fight between alleged BFFs Tonya and Derrick, with Tonya stating (correctly) that she's pissed with everyone voting for her when there were much more deserving teams. Derrick gets all defensive, but everyone knows he's wrong. Including him, probably.
Cristin's Two Cents:
Could there be anyone I love more than Diem? When she got through the challenge by saying that she was going to pretend there were alligators in the water, my heart totally sang. Besides, no one is ever going to be able to vote someone currently undergoing chemotherapy into exile, let alone someone who's as effing awesome as this girl. I really hope she doesn't hit it with Derrik. She's totally Theo-worthy. I also like how Evan described is injury as "an athletic hernia." Yes Evan, we're sure everything you do is athletic. You get Runners Hangnail and Athletes Foot and Sporty Headaches and Jock Itch. You're great. You can do it all. You're Bo Jackson, we get it. Now shut up.
Dan's Two Cents:
I kind of feel bad for Tonya. I mean, just because a girl's mentally ill doesn't mean she can't be a good competitor. I'm curious to see how one of the veteran challenge competitor teams does in exile. I have a feeling Tonya's way stronger than Casey, so Wes/Casey's lucky streak may be coming to an end.
Wes' assy remarks are almost beginning to parody themselves. That is, they'd be funny because of how exaggerated and persistent they are, but he's still such a douche that it's impossible to extract any joy out of them. This recent spell of boasting caused my roommate (a pacifist and usually not a Fresh Meat viewer to say "I just want to grab his head and shake it.")
The Scoreboard:
Teams:
Cristin's Blue Iguanas: Katie/Eric; Johanna/Jesse; Tonya/Johnnie; Theo/Chanda; Shane/Linette
Dan's Green Monkeys: Coral/Evan; Melinda/Ryan; Tina/Kenny; Darrell/Aviv; Derrick/Diem
Competition:
4 points awarded for each competition won, four points deducted for an elimination.
Cristin's tally: 4 (Theo/Chanda victory)
Dan's tally: 0
Drama-rama (3 points per infraction):
Includes: crying; lovers quarrels; racial/ethnic/other slurs; physical violence; extreme displays of drunkeness (includes falling down, excessive slurring, vomiting); same sex encounters onscreen (worth four points because Dan says so); shown or implied hook-ups (includes make-outs and all forms of bedroom activity).
Cristin's tally: 0
Dan's tally: 3 (Diem – crying)
Loose talk (2 points per phrase):
Includes: "step it up," "balls to the wall," "not a team player," "pull together as a team," "deserves to be here," any reference to effort exerted in excess of 100%
Cristin's tally: 2 (Johnnie – "pull together as a team")
Dan's tally: 2 (Derrick – "balls out" [close enough])
Side note: Cristin notes that this has been a very balls-ish episode, with Wes using the phrases "she has to grab onto the balls I know she has somewhere" and "everyone in this room has no cajones," in addition to Derrick's comment.
Cristin's old total: 24
Dan's old total: 26
Cristin's new total: 30
Dan's new total: 31