I just want to be the first to tell you — there’s no new Project Runway this week.

It’s not fair, I know.

There’s no obvious reason for this, but now you can free up your evening.  Just keep drinking and don’t worry about being home by ten.

Lately, I’ve become obsessed with the idea of “safe words.” That is, the words people say when they’re in some sort of kinky S&M kind of situation and they’ve decided they’ve had enough. Because, you know, if they just say “no, stop, you’re hurting me,” that could be part of the fantasy.

In any case, I just think that it’s really funny to think of shouting the least erotic, most incongruous word in the heat of the moment — at the peak of the psychological and physical intensity. Like — you’re all sweaty and leathery and weird, and then all of a sudden you have to shout “Delaware!” to make them stop whatever they’re doing.

On that note, I’ve created TiFaux’s Top Ten Suggested TV-Related Safe Words.

10. The Dharma Initiative
9. Celebrity Fit Club
8. L.C.’s headband
7. Michael Chikles
6. “Gossip Girl does not accurately depict Brooklyn”
5. “Bravo: Watch what happens”
4. Lifetime Movie Network
3. Cylon resurrection ship
2. “Utensils down, hands up”
1. Moesha

I want one.  And not just because Jake Gyllenhaal has one.

• Julie Benz (Rita on Dexter) tries to rally support for Dexter’s turn on CBS as well as her role in Rambo.
• ABC is being fined for boobage on NYPD Blue. Back in 2003.
• The writers for Mad Men and Weeds are getting back to work.
• The writers strike is doing more damage — this time bringing Dan Cortese back from obscurity.
• Jorge Garcia (Hurley from Lost) talks about the new season.
• Battlestar’s third season is now being released March 18.
• New York magazine talks about shows from the 80s they’d like to see resurrected.
• TNT has .
• ABC has slashed its number of pilot scripts.
• On Wednesday, ABC will air the Lost third season finale all Pop-up Video-like.
• Moment of Truth is doing lamentably well.
• Lifetime has a reality show about dancers and (surprise) mothers.
• Spike from Buffy .
• Jeff Probst tells all about the new Survivor cast.
• Alec Baldwin, Tina Fey and the cast of The Office won SAG awards.