Who Would Win in a Fight: Jan Levinson vs. Sandra Lee

Posted by Dan July 13th, 2007 at 02:31pm In Food Network The Office Who Would Win in a Fight

Before we get to our next match-up, let’s take a moment to reflect on last week’s head-to-head featuring the suave Anderson Cooper and the suaver Tim Gunn. Now, Anderson Cooper won (of course), but he did so by a surprisingly small margin. I have to admit that this wasn’t really a fair fight — but by the time I had written everything out, I didn’t feel like going back and changing it. So, yeah. I’m thinking that people just like Tim Gunn a lot, and that played into the votes.

The voting, let me tell you, was out of control. Thanks to some high profile links, we got a lot of attention on this one. I think that maybe every fight should be between two cult icons. Like maybe Smack Teflon from Schmigh School Schmusical (scrambled to prevent the unsavory riff-raff from googling) or Buffy characters.

Maybe next week. This time, we’ve got two methodical career women who will flash you a white, gleaming smile while eviscerating you. We’ve got Jan from The Office vs. the Food Network’s Sandra Lee (see this post for background).

Jan, who started off on The Office as Michael Scott’s long-suffering superior, has morphed into a Jeckyll and Hyde character. On the surface, she’s a buttoned-up corporate career woman, but there’s a hedonistic, demanding and fiery sexpot brewing under the surface.

On the other hand, we’ve got Sandra Lee — flaxen-haired Food Network hostess with an exacting and insatiable appetite for presentation and color coordination. God help the hapless buffoon who tampers with her tablescapes.

Jan Levinson

Strengths:

• Organized and composed
• Not afraid of confrontation
• Unpredictable

Weaknesses:

• Mentally ill
• Comparatively easy to manipulate
• Emotionally fragile

Secret Weapon: Her sexuality

Sandra Lee

Strengths:

• Has excellent knife technique
• Can kill with her stare
• People underestimate blondes

Weaknesses:

• Over-concern with presentation can be a handicap
• Skinny arms
• Possibly made of porcelain

Secret Weapon: Can find innovative, time-saving ways to kick ass