That’s from a great little review of 24 in this week’s New Yorker. They even point out Cristin’s whisper-yell: “…almost every bit of Jack’s dialogue was rendered first in an intense whisper and then in an angry shout, as in ‘Where is the bomb? I said, “Where is the bomb“!’”

If you see a copy of the magazine, I definitely recommend taking a look at the hilarious drawing of Jack and Chloe they’ve “artistically” interpreted for the article. It’s not online, but it is one of the oddest things I have ever seen. Jack doesn’t look so great (what have they done to Jack?), and poor Chloe doesn’t even look human.

Ok, so I’m an American. I spent my whole life mostly in New England, once crossing over the border at Niagra Falls which cost me a dime when I went through the turnstile. But because of a great opportunity to edit Hal Hartley’s new film Fay Grim (a sequel to Henry Fool) I’m living in Berlin for the next 7 months. One of the first things I did when I got to my Berlin apartment was turn on the television. I had nothing else to do so I thought I’d check it out. Boy did it suck. Every show was shot on video (ick!) and despite my total inability to understand German, I could tell that the acting was no good. But since that first day I’ve discovered that being unable to understand what an actor is saying makes it much easier to evaluate their performance. I was watching a few minutes of Home Improvement dubbed in German (why?) and the acting was also awful, something I had noticed when it was in English, but hadn’t fully appreciated. Is it a coincidence that Home Improvement was shot on video?

From what I’ve seen the best television in Germany is American shows dubbed into German. There is of course the Simpsons, which James Urbaniak–one of the stars of Fay Grim–discussed in his blog recently. Apparently Jeff Goldblum was also very interested in the subject (I’m dropping names). It’s hard to get used to, but odds are I already know the whole episode by heart so it’s fun to watch. The best dubbing I’ve seen was in The Gilmore Girls. They really had the rhythm down. When you talk that fast, even if it’s in German it’s still funny. One thing I have NOT seen on German television is Arrested Development. I’m willing to bet it’s not being shown here. I have no problem with that. 24 definitely would work in any language, but I haven’t managed to catch it. I bet they have a good German Jack. A lot of Germans talk like him anyway. Consenting to be Jack Bauer’s partner automatically makes your life insurance null and void.

There are a few things that show up in English. There are of course the International news channels, BBC World and CNN International. At first I enjoyed watching them, but I lost interest when I realized they didn’t do stories about missing white girls. And the audio on CNN International is about 5 frames out of sync. Since I spend all day syncing up dailies at work, that drives me crazy. CNN International shows the weekly Daily Show International, which is a highlight show from the last 4 episodes. Jon introduces pieces without the studio audience, and the silence always makes me think his jokes are dying. Yeah, sometimes I need a laugh track.

The other thing that is sometimes English is MTV, which still manages to show music videos. How do they do it? The US MTV has two whole channels that don’t play videos anymore. It must be that German efficiency. But a lot of times they show stuff like Cribs or one of their many profile shows and do English audio with German subtitles. Britney Spears is never dubbed. Because Britney gotta be Britney, yo.

I must see this. I mean Right. Now.

24 million tweens can’t be wrong.

But no, it really was John McCain who handed someone a piece of paper on 24 on Monday. If I were John McCain, I would’ve insisted on a line, like “That’s against protocol, Jack” or “Lynn wants to see you in his office” or “I’m uploading the schematics to your phone right now.”

Jon Stewart’s new baby’s name is Maggie.

This must mean something.